Finely Honed Avoidance Techniques

I know I have an excruciatingly difficult decision looming. The best way to tell is from the cleanliness of my drawers and cupboards. I've cleaned out my sock drawer, my paper catch-all drawer in the kitchen, and my potting bench in the garage. They've never been so clean. I've even organized my random-cosmetics-hair-products-and-perfume-samples drawer. This obviously must be a gut-wrenching decision.

I've been perfecting the art of avoidance for years now. It started in college when I would notice how anally clean my bedroom seemed to get during finals. Things that hadn't seen the light of day since they were unloaded from my parent's car and stashed under the less-than-twin bed in my microscopic dorm room were suddenly aired out, fresh, and sparkling. The harder the exam--the cleaner the floor in the bathroom. The more intense the final-paper pressure--the more organized the shoe pile became.

It must have something to do with control. When my life seems a bit out of my control I need my environment to be tightly buttoned up. When my mind is cluttered, my spoons all have to be facing the same way in the silverware drawer.

It's a little psychotic I know. But I think until this decision is made, my house is just going to get neater. I'd write more about this, but my bookshelf is calling. Those books really should be arranged by topic and size. Don't you think?