Friday, July 18, 2008

Achieving Peace

Do you ever get the feeling that there is something you should be doing, but you just can't remember what it is? That nagging feeling in the back of your mind that you are forgetting something you've committed to? I have that feeling today. I've checked my calendar. It's blank. I've checked my messages. They are blank. I've checked my mind—blank.

But with this blankness comes an anxiousness. It's more familiar to have a list of busyness. It's more calming to see thing getting done even if the impact of their completion will be forgotten by the time I walk into the next room. Can I shed the busywork for the real work of turning anxiety into calm? Can I put down the achievement crutch I've relied on for years? Can I turn my back on getting done and embrace just being?

But there is something...something. And when it doesn't get done I'll pay the consequences I didn't agree to. When it doesn't get done maybe I'll realize that it is.


DeLaina said...

You were supposed to meet me for lunch at Food for Thought at 1:30!!! JK LOL

Anonymous said...

"But with this blankness comes an anxiousness"

In these 7 words and those that follow you have eloquently captured what ailed me for 6 weeks from Thanksgiving to New year's. I became phsycally ill and ended up losing about 50 pounds. I wish I'd had the courage to be honest with my friends or even myself rather than turning to medical doctors and specialists who were unable to find anything wrong with me. Your gift for introspection is inspiring.