Do you ever get the feeling that there is something you should be doing, but you just can't remember what it is? That nagging feeling in the back of your mind that you are forgetting something you've committed to? I have that feeling today. I've checked my calendar. It's blank. I've checked my messages. They are blank. I've checked my mind—blank.
But with this blankness comes an anxiousness. It's more familiar to have a list of busyness. It's more calming to see thing getting done even if the impact of their completion will be forgotten by the time I walk into the next room. Can I shed the busywork for the real work of turning anxiety into calm? Can I put down the achievement crutch I've relied on for years? Can I turn my back on getting done and embrace just being?
But there is something...something. And when it doesn't get done I'll pay the consequences I didn't agree to. When it doesn't get done maybe I'll realize that it is.
10 months ago